eight Sex Moves to Drive Him Permanently Insane

Issue 10.ane - Love and Sex - Jan 8, 2015

couple in bathroom

Every girl wants to drive her man wild in the bedroom. What's hotter than sexing a guy and then good, he has to become alive in the woods because he doesn't know how society works anymore? In that location'due south nothing like pushing a guy by what he can psychologically handle so that he lives the rest of his life as an invalid. Pluck the sanity right out of your man's frontal lobe with these scorching tips:

i. Put his cognitive abilities on ice.

Sideslip an ice cube into your oral cavity before going down on your man for a powerful sensation that'll knock him dorsum to the cognitive abilities of a toddler. You'll transport an icy-hot shiver up his spine that volition brand its manner to his encephalon and ruin it forever.

2. Two-paw twist his shaft – and his reality.

The next fourth dimension you go downwardly on your guy, twist your hands in opposite directions along his member. This move won't only requite your mouth a pause and increase his pleasance; it'll also make him experience so good, he'll be completely disoriented and terrified of what is happening. After this move, he won't even know his own name! Non knowing his own name volition make his life very difficult.

3.  Remove his ability to reason with mid-coital Kegels.

Spice upward any P-in-Five encounter with a tight squeeze! He'll be moaning for more, and for his mother, and for his commanding officer. That's right: This sensational "hug" will accept him thinking he's back in 'Nam. He never even went to 'Nam! He's 27! Xin chào, pleasure!

iv. Imprison him in his own listen with a bustling blowjob.

Humans accept evolved to fear buzzing sounds, equally they tin can signal an earthquake, a cloud of insects, or an orgasm and then intense it shatters your mind into a million pieces. When you're giving him a blowjob, simply start humming whatsoever melody. Hum louder and louder. Information technology'll be the last vocal he hears before becoming completely locked in for the rest of his life. You know, locked in? Where someone is conscious but can't move or communicate at all? You get it!

5. Massage the madness out of his glute muscles.

Guys concur a lot of tension in their large muscle groups. Knead your duke into the sides of his hips and he'll release everything – specially the rage he's kept carefully repressed for decades. Soon he'll exist acting out in ways that put his old dad in the loony bin back in the fifties. Practice they however phone call information technology that? Insanity is hot!

half dozen. Stroke his prostate until information technology looks similar he'south had a stroke.

Information technology's well into the new millennium, and straight guys are evolved plenty to enjoy a little backdoor action. Carefully insert a finger inside him until y'all experience a little walnut-shaped knot, and stroke it back and forth until half his confront permanently collapses into an emotionless shell. Even years of electroconvulsive therapy won't rewire the severed connections in his brain.

7. Pretend to exist a sexy stranger until he doesn't know who you are anymore.

Rekindle your "spark" next to the pulverisation keg that is "everything he holds to exist true" past donning a sexy disguise. Your comforting assertions that, "Information technology's merely Kerry, Dan; it's me, Kerry!" will autumn on deafened ears – Kerry is definitely non a redhead French maid! Kerry is Kerry! Who are y'all? Nothing says "keeping it fresh" similar calling your brother-in-law for assistance in the middle of the night.

viii. Snap his sanity with butterfly kisses on his lower belly.

If y'all actually want to push button him over the edge of sanity, graze your man'southward "happy trail" with your eyelashes. The deluded ramblings he emits after you perform this delicate motion will have you gently nodding, forcing a smile while softly weeping, and reaching for the phone to telephone call the nearest sanitarium. He'll exist groaning with pleasure past the fourth dimension those big lugs from St. Mary'south toss him into a padded truck.

However you exercise information technology, there's nothing similar scrambling your man's mind forever. He'll exist thanking you (who he thinks is his nurse simply can't be certain) for a long, long time!